Adam's posterity

So when you have it, it just lies around in your room. Every now and then you may take notice of it, and sometimes -but not as much as you thought you would, in the beginning- make use of it. You still think it’s beautiful, you know all It’s qualities and it has more of them than you initially thought. Sometimes you get the time to admire it, and sometimes you don’t because there is an everyday routine of your life, and not that it isn't a part of that routine or that It’s not important enough but look at it this way; water is so important that you can’t live without it, but you don’t go around drinking it all the time. Despite all your routine, your lack of taking notice of it and all your carelessness, if you find out that it might be snatched from you or it actually gets taken away, your life has a fair chance of turn up-side down, and most probably it would.

Such is the nature of this son and daughter of Adam, and never in another million years will this vary. But if its bothering you, know this and tie it to your immediately-negative-thinking pea size of a brain that if he is like this, so are you –a little less, a little more- but you are; and likewise for you, gentlemen.

My dear, my dear..

My dear, my dear

I'm right here

under the sky and close to you

now shut you eyes and feel me through

let me brace, let me tend

your form and soul, I shall mend

My Luv, my luv

I have you here

resting at my bosom, safe in my arms

free of any bounds and free of all the fears

I shall give you all my bloom

that all your seasons be halcyoned

My sweet, my sweet

I am forever close to you

to kiss you when you wanna be loved

to nod when you wanna be approved

I shall take you by the hand

past highs-and-lows till the end

My strong, my strong

I need your strength

this rain remind that sky may be dark

you shall walk us through and i'll be the spark

you need not worry, you must not fall

hold my hand and stand tall

My amor, my amor

we are boundary less

I'm here, I'm near

I shall catch each of your tear

I'm with you in everything you sought

I'm here my luv, even when I'm not..

- Ms.Shehab

Tear

Na yun tabah kar mujhe

Na ese tou juda kar mujhe

Wahan ho ankh pur-numm

Aur na mile daman-e-tar mujhe

Ye do kadam hain ke mit-te nhi

Ke paar hon, mile ghar mujhe

Kis kadar hai shadeed justuju

tou kyun na dikhe wo dar mujhe

khamoshi main guzara hai jo waqt

Lage jese ek umr mujhe

Ab ke toot raha hai zabt

Ab tou aghosh main bhar mujhe

- Ms.Shehab

Two Things

I once read, “One can do anything if he really wants to.”

I have lived my life believing this lie, but trust me you all, it is not as true as it seems. Yes, you should put your 100 percent in what you believe, in what you believe is right and worthy of it but there is no guarantee that you'll actually be able to do it or that you'll reap any fruit out of it because like I always say, life doesn't provide any guarantees or warranties. There are two things one must keep in mind. First, you are only a reflection of God, not God himself, so do not try to play the God, 'cause you can't. There are things that are in your control and there are things that aren't so don't flatter yourself by trying to take everything in your hand believing that you can handle it all, because you cannot. Period. At times, though, you may, but also at times you may not so keep both the possibility in your mind. Put in your complete effort and then leave the matter in the Almighty One's hands, and believe you me he is greater than your greatest imagination, thus can handle it all and once you have left all your precious effort in the safest hands then for your own mental stability's sake, relax! rather than worrying your brains out on something that you no longer have any control over. Don’t torment yourself by pushing yourself over the edge. Cut yourself some slack. God himself said that he does not put burden upon a person beyond his level of tolerance, which means that every person has a certain level of tolerance and there is no reason why you should believe or force yourself to act otherwise and excruciate yourself to insanity by putting too much pressure because it would make you mentally unstable.

Second, (the following theory was presented to me by The Teacher) the environment around you speaks to you in morse-code, learn to decipher it. If you have been trying and trying and doing all you can but things still won't work; know that the environment is telling you to halt! To take a break, to give it some time, and I have already dedicated half of the post “A Realization” to the importance of time, to giving time it’s due share and the importance of it which concludes to the fact that “time” is required in healing, ripening, and maturing of every phenomenon, person, wound, problem and relationship. If one you have tried everything with absolutely every method and your issue still wouldn’t get anywhere, give the thing some time, maybe that is all it needs, rather all you need to refresh your mind and start looking into thing in a whole new dimension and to be able to see the picture from a whole new perspective which was earlier obscured to you due to mounting tension in your head which didn’t let you concentrate on any other visible side of it.

So to conclude the idea in a nutshell – Do not push yourself beyond your saturation point, it doesn’t prove how strong you are but how insecure you are to share your difficulties, which helps in no way other than complicating matters even further because you can’t do everything on your won, each and every one of us need help; there is a series of reasons why human being is called “social animal”. Also listen to your environment as it speaks to you.

Lastly, unlike the Almighty One and Love; Human beings are “time”, “space” and “distance” bound and there is no denying to it.

(Denial is only a defense mechanism anyway and does not help in any constructive manner.)

Senseless Luv

When you see your beloved smile or hear the sound of their laughter, their mere presence in your time of joy or misery, the warmth of their hug, the fragrance of their skin, the taste of their kiss, feels comfortable; these are simple pleasures of life and Luv, these usual extraordinary comforts are experienced by us owing to the most beautiful wonders that we have been bestowed with, the five senses. These senses help merge the two souls together, and yet a greater Luv is that which is devoid of the five senses, when you still Luv with all your heart and soul without seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting or touching the one you luv. Like the divine Luv, the Luv of the creator. The creator is neither seen, heard, smelt, tasted nor touched but you know, you believe that hes up there, watching over you, happie in your joy and looking out to you in your misery, likewise the luv of a human to another is by all means possible and possible with all the more intensity without the presence of any of the five senses, infact such a luv is greater than the usual on account of the fact that such a luv is free of any greed or lust. Conviction is all it takes.

Agreed that the luv of God shall not be compared to that of the mortals but we’re all the creation of the creator and so do possess a part of him in us “Anā l-Ḥaqq.”

“tu khuda hai aur mera ishq farishton jaisa

Ye bandagi hai sou lazim hai hijaabon main rahain”

Not Enough

Two things that neither matter nor would make an actual difference in life and would never be enough are “knowing” and “wanting”. You may know a million things and you may want even more so, it doesn’t matter, not to anyone and even to yourself, it’s gonna do you no good. If you really know something, if it’s really absorbed in you and you truly want it too, make a move, do something about it, and just procrastinating on the basis of the fact that you know you can do it, doesn’t make it happen because again “knowing is not enough” also I believe “something that can be done at any time will at the end not be done at all” and someone once told me “You may judge yourself all you want on the basis of what you can do but the world is always gonna judge you on what you have done and theres by all odds a difference between the two.”

You may love it to the core, you may want it more than anything in the whole wide world and you may know all too well that you can’t have it, won’t do you any good, because neither knowing that you can’t have it will keep you from wanting it, nor wanting it will let you actually have it and the circle will go on and on until the fate -and trust me fate knows no emotional borders (and just to stay optimistic – optimistic to the limit of foolishness as I call it -still, fate knows no borders at all ;) )- will snatch it away from you with just a blink of those eyes, those glowing, gleaming beautiful eyes of yours, from right under your nose and you would be able to do nothing, absolutely nothing at all regardless of all your knowing and wanting. As the clock ticks, and as this sand of time keeps slipping down my fingers, densing this void inside, the fear, the dread keeps mounting, the fear of losing, losing this amazingness that I’m currently living through, and despite knowing it all, I still want it to the core, and worse, I know theres nothing I can do about it.

Breakdown

Zindagi main zindagi muqarar howa karti hai

Maut bhi doston kya naymat howa karti hai

Ilm howa jo, ke howe hain ilm se tabah

Jana ke la-ilmi hazar daulat howa karti hai

Girte, sanbhalte chale magar na hosla chora

Ba-wafa rehna kahin taqat howa karti hai

Saath rehna humesha zaroori tou nhi

Dour rehna bhi bari wafa howa karti hai

Jism ka kya, aj ho, kal na howa kare

Rooh se rooh ki asl mohobat howa karti hai

Bikhar jane ki khwahish hai zabt kyun ho

Mujhe, khudi se apni, adaawat howa karti hai

Meri wehshat dehleez paar hai ab ke

Lab kholna hi yahan baghawat howa karti hai

Saabit rehna hi jahan main tey nhi Rabiya

Toot jane ki kabhi kabhi zaroorat howa karti hai

- Ms. Shehab

Dilemma Of Luv

Har raasta bhi kuch raha mushkil

kuch manzil bhi meri mere pas na thi

shikwe na shikayat na koi gila

kismat hi zara apne saath na thi

sukoon talab hai is talaatum ke baad

meri kashti ke sahil pe muddat na thi

kis qadar be-bas hoon tere zulm ke aage

qabal kabhi be-basi ki ye shiddat na thi

tum pe kese dharoon ilzaam bewafai ka

tumhari fitrat se kab mujhe waqfiyat na thi

main is liye bhi zyada meherbaan rahi

mohobbat main aitedaal ki qail zara na thi

tumari khala, tumare mousam, tumara zamana

meri bahar ko is main kuch mouhlut na thi

maine chaha buht ke na chahoon tumhain

mere ikhtiyar main magar meri chahat na thi

khud apne hi teer se ghaayal hain rabiya

khudaaon ki tou pehle ye aadat na thi

- Ms.Shehab

Reality of Fear

Fear is merely a state of mind. One who has anything to lose, has the fear of losing it and when theres nothing to lose, theres nothing to be afraid of. The most fearful person is he, who has the fear of losing that which he doesn't posess but values, it gives a combination of the fear of losing and the insecurity of not posessing. The former because one makes unspoken commitments and the latter because one is afraid that somebody else might get steal it away.

Fear is not that of dark, but of the unknown. People are not afraid of speaking, they're afraid of contradiction. One is not fearful of trying again but of getting hurt again. Sometimes we're not afraid of asking, but we're just afraid because we know the answer and dread it. One is never afraid of loving, but of not being loved back. Though all my life I accepted it for a fact but I've realized now that I'm not afraid of height, I'm just afraid of falling, and I'm not afraid of confession because I know my truth, and that I am speaking and portraying it at all times.

Spring Breeze

There she sat by the open window, and though shes there with 40 other people and a voice sure is falling on her ears but shes far far away in a parallel universe, looking out the window at the distant horizon eastward. A flow of cold spring breeze touched her face blowing her hair backwards, she helplessly smiled in the most helplessly sorrowful manner for she is reminded of a verse of an unknown poet

"jo zyada yaad aaon main

tou tum ankhain bandh kar lena

jo chal jaye hawa thandi

samajh jana ke wo hoon main"

Sitting there with her eyes glowing with memories she felt old, much older than her chronological age and she thought "Sometimes age comes without wisdom, and at times wisdom comes a lot before age."

Staring at the distant horizon with the slight cold spring breeze blowing she missed someone so bad that shes paralyzed; can't speak, can't move, can't breath, can't even shed a tear.

After what seemed like ages she raised her sight a little to look at the sky, the blue covering is itself covered with white cotton-like clouds today. She took a deep breath, smiled again, shed a tear or two and spoke his words aloud "we're under the same sky..."

Smothered

“Can’t you see that you’re smothering me, holding too tightly, afraid to lose control” (Linkin Park – “numb”) You sure are protective of the persons you love but don’t take away their space, every person needs a space around them, that shall not be and not tried to be penetrated unless the person wants you to, because doing so without their consent is as much assault as anything. Love is taking care of someone, being protective, possessive and careful but in the end everything you want matters less than anything your beloved wants. Love for a living being – particularly human – is not decorating them on a shelf in your house like a pretty decorative-piece, so you may look at them each day, and make sure they are alive, safe and in front of you; and how would you define “alive” anyway? Does alive mean merely to have a pulse and breath? To have one’s vital signs working? Theres a difference in "being alive" and "living" and you sure as hell don’t want you loved one to be “alive” but you also want them “to live”. You cannot tie them to a string and let them lose as far as the string allows, on the contrary Love is to let your beloved free, let them where they want to be, where their happiness lies, give them their space, privacy and let them decide their priorities; you cannot dictate them, “Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.” - Eleanor Roosevelt and no one have any right to take away anyone’s individuality.

Coming to the second point of concern (for someone who will never bother to read this but I wish someday, when it doesn’t even matter anymore, when its way way too late to un-do the damage, they would read this) Love, does not depend on your mood, when you love them, you love them; though theres obviously no hard-and-fast rule but it is for sure not possible to claim to love someone and then not be in a mood to care about their happiness, rather it is to sacrifice your wish, comfort and want for their happiness.

It is better to let a person die than forcing them to be alive on your conditions, and knowing that they’re merely alive.

"Maine chaha androh-e-wafa se chootoon

 wo sitamgar mere marne pe bhi raazi na howa"

Ahmed Faraz

Ranjish hii sahii dil hii dukhaane ke liye aa
Aa phir se mujhe chhod ke jaane ke liye aa

Kuchh to mere pindaar-e-muhabbat ka bharam rakh
Tuu bhii tou kabhii mujh ko manaane ke liye aa

Pahale se maraasim na sahii phir bhii kabhii tou
Rasm-o-rahe duniyaa hii niibhaane ke liye aa

Kis kis ko bataayenge judaaii kaa sabab hum 
Tuu mujh se Khafaa hai tou zamaane ke liye aa 

Ab tak dil-e-Khush-faham ko tujh se hain ummiiden 
Ye aaKhirii shammen bhii bujhaane ke liye aa

Ek umr se huun lazzat-e-giriyaa se bhii maharuum

Ay raahat-e-jaan mujh ko rulaane ke liye aa

Maanaa ki muhabbat kaa chhipaanaa hai muhabbat 
Chupake se kisii roz jataane ke liye aa

Jaise tujhe aate hai.n na aane ke bahaane
Aise hii kisii roz na jaane ke liye aa

A Realization

Sometimes you’re too excited with something that you assume nothing can go wrong, but actually you need your senses and rationality at all times or the best can go wrong. So when you’re sure that everything is under control and tend to get careless that’s exactly when everything slips out of control, as a result of which, you panic and try to put things right but in your state of panic and shock every attempt you make not just goes in vain but also ruins the matter further – like I already said you need your senses and rationality at all times. Now that you have ruined everything; sit back, relax, take 10 deep breathes “rafiki” style, summon back your serenity, tell yourself that as far as your intentions are pure, the Almighty will get you out of this mess, BUT you have to be SURE that your intentions are pure and are in the best interest of whoever is involved. Once you’re sure of this, give the matter some time, let the storm pass, wait on the shore, because someone told me once that “you can do anything but you can’t do everything” so not everything is at all times in your control, like Iqbal said

“zaroorat tor deti hai ghoroor-o-be-niazi ko,

na hoti koi majboori tou har banda khuda hota”

(Impuissance breaks men’s pride and vanity, for every man would be God, if there was no weakness in men)

True that! If everything was in everyones control everyone would be God. One is to understand that there are things which are absolutely in God’s control and you need not frustrate yourself on those, rather just believe in the divine power and have patience, give time it’s right and let it play it’s role for time is a very major factor in learning, growing, understanding and letting the teachings sink deep in you. After all what are all these problems about They teach you, help you grow stronger, and simply help you grow and understand the pain of suffering so that you may cherish and value happiness for only dark made men value light, and the cold made men value warmth.

Finally one fact to be kept in the focus of the mind is that nothing stays with you forever except your soul and you knowledge, feed both spiritually and intellectually, respectively; and since nothing else stays be ready always, to let go and expect least, because no one can help you unless you try to help yourself, remember Jesus carried his own cross.

“The last lesson to be learned is to ‘let go’” – Ms.Shehab

I walk alone

“Every human is ultimately on his/her own” for one goes six feet below the earth alone, everyone has ever since the time began and everyone will till the time lasts, irrespective of what position you hold in the world, they all have to go down, and have to go alone.

she sat back and took a deep breath and ponders.. where from here? But it’s so foolish of you to think that, for you have been given access to almost everywhere now, your angel has highlighted all the guidelines that you could have ever ask for, you’ve been shown the most direct way, and unfortunately you are smart enough to walk the rest yourself so you have to take the journey alone, for angels too have their own obligations to fulfill, while “you” weren’t even an obligation and yet this one helped – in fact “help” would be an understatement.

With this thought of departing she feels an urge to flow out an ocean of tears but she braces herself and holds back, shes decided she wouldn’t cry, wouldn’t let out a single tear for she doesn’t want this pain to flow out and dry away, (somebody once told her “Luv without pain is incomplete” and she seconds the thought) she wants this to remain, she wants this to remind her forever that she can’t let herself  fall because her success won’t be hers but it will be a gift for the messiah, the least she could give against what the messiah has given.

She can see a long way ahead and feels herself all ready for the journey, with heaving chest  and receding breath she closes her eyes.

Agay barhon ya mai thum jaon yaheen

Mera mausam guzra ya abhi guzra naheen

Mera badan aadi ho chala hai jalte jalte, ya

Ab is dhoop main wo kadi tapish naheen

Wo rehnumaan jo mujhe rasta dikhla gaya

Janta tha ke is raste main os ka dar naheen

Wo kesa insaan hai ke insaan lage bhi na

Aur wo kehta hai ke wo farishta bhi naheen

Apni talash main phirti rahi buht dar-ba-dar

Jaanti hoon khud ko phir kyun pehchana naheen

Ab rasta tou samne hai mera mere magar

Mere saath rah main mera hum-safar naheen

Kitni be-hisaab hain aadmi ki khwahishaat magar

Sab hi mil jaye ye bhi tou Rabiya mumkin naheen..

- Ms.Shehab

10 Things I Hate About You..

1. I hate the way you can always make me smile even when I'm at the brink of tears, it makes me feel luved..
2. I hate the way you embrace me and make me lose myself to you and melt in your arms, and feel protected like being in a flower bud
3. Hate the way you make me feel B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L even when I know I'm looking ugly
4. Hate your ADORABLE "D" shaped smile that makes the world look more colorful, and the sunlight seems brighter, and the birds sound more rhythmic, and the breeze seems more refreshing
5. Hate your poetry and all the "us" that it expresses, for it makes me crave for the yesterday that we had...
6. Hate how you talk (particularly how you pronounce the alphabet "a") , your accent, your voice, your whispers that still echo in my ears; make me want to kiss you full on the lips
7. Hate the silent whispers that we converse through and know exactly what the other is thinking, makes me feel like sharing my soul with you
8. Hate the way your hands run across my form and make me feel like warm water running through me, and want the magic to stay forever..
9. Hate all the funny/cute/silly/spontaneous expressions you give, that make me forget all the woes of life and live this with you till the time lasts. 
10. Hate the way you express your Luv, and make me fall for you all over again... <3

Watch me burn..

Ankhon se un ko bahaa jo diya humne

Ye daawa hai dil se nikaal bhi diya humne

Ye gumaan hai ke ehm nhi hum un ke waaste

Un ke gumaan se khud ko, magar tabah kiya humne

Ab bhi osi manzil ki justuju ka hisar hai

Jis ka raasta hi muddat se chor diya humne

Apni anaa ke bar-khilaaf, apne ghuroor ke tazad se

Apni zaat ko un k aagay bichcha diya humne

Ye kesa karwaan guzar gaya hai ranjish ka

Un ki yaadon ko jab nzr-e-aatish kiya humne

Rabiya kyun-kar keh doon wo nhi mujh main shamil?

Ke un ke ehsaas ko apni rooh main basaa liya humne

- Ms.Shehab

Helpless

*she bursts into laughter* shes laughing so hard her eyes are watery. Shes laughing because shes tired of crying and everything, absolutely everything seems so hilariously against her that she can't help but laugh on herself, on her fate and on all that is happening to her. She pauses to think "pehle ati thi haal-e-dil pe hanssi, ab har baat pe ati hai" and this made her smile even more broadly, thinking about the only other person who would be smiling at this idea, but no! not anymore! Shes not gonna hurt herself anymore, she not gonna bother about anything anymore, "I mean honestly! Why the hell should I storm my brains when the other person is proving out to be so cold and so indifferent? and what was it again? "I was busy all along." Sure you were busy, even i don't have all the time in the world to sit around and trouble myself over these things (though it was proving to be pretty difficult to lie to herself because deep down inside she knows well that, it was the only thing she did all the time, while he was away) Yea so thats about it - I don't care anymore"

Shes broken as hell "It was only a freakin word, you could've said it! It would have wasted no breaths of yours! Just a small 5 letter word of affection! What harm would that have done except putting a mere smile on the lips of the woman you apparently love? or simply given her hope?" and then on the spur of the moment it struck her, like a ray of sun making its way through the tiniest of the cracks in the woods and enlightening everything that lies beyond; hope is the last thing she should be carrying with her in this matter, when there is no practical possibility of her beautiful beautiful fantasy to turn into reality as yet, and the less she hopes the less it'll hurt her, so that was the only reason why he held back and hurt himself - of course what could be a punishment worse for a poet to not express his poem with enchanting words - and he took this torment upon himself to ease her suffering?.. She helplessly fell of him all over again with affection ten times stronger.

Speaking Silence..

They're silent not because they don't have anything to say but because they have so much to say, they don't know where to start from. She is staring ahead and she knows that hes staring back from somewhere far beyond her horizons, from behind these veils of distance and a surge of uncertain thoughts ran through her head, "Does he want to talk? Is there the slightest bit of a something that he might be wanting to say? Is it only me or is he as restless? Does it matter to him as much as it does to me?" She cries his name in a bare whisper and stretches out her hand. She wants him to listen, she wants him to understand the unspoken, shes aware that he has the potential to, he has been doing it for a while now. If only they could tangibly be in the tender presence of one another, how different the world would seem, how many more colors that would add to the universe or would the addition merely be to her perception? Shes not sure, shes not sure of anything anymore owing to the drastic turns her life has taken in these past couple of months; it was like some revelations of realizations have descended down upon her from the heavens above, but shes even not sure as to take these as a blessing or as an encumbrance, for shes convinced now that ignorance, by all definitions is indeed a bliss, and once out of this bestial, yet protective obscurity, there is no going back, and now shes out.

One thing she can say for sure now is that there is nothing like being sure. She has experienced it all her life and this time it has hit her in the face, in the most substantial of its forms that every time she convinces herself of being sure of what is going to happen next and the road ahead seems smoother than a glass surface, she begins to accelerate, just about then there is always a speed bump waiting ahead. So yea coming back to the point there is nothing like being sure, and shes sure of it!

With the stampede of all these thoughts she is still staring ahead at his immovable, representative-of-his-presence face, and though there is a tug-of-war going on inside her between wanting to say something out of love and fidgety and holding back due to a number of complicated reasons the most prominent of which being that she doesn't want to hurt him even at the cost of her life, and she knows, the more they converse, the closer they get (if getting any closer was possible) and in the long-run more it'll hurt; there was still a sort of solace in her heart, knowing that he is there, even if not actually there, but in someway, shes reminded of the very beautiful lines of the song "Iris" that they once shared "I give up forever to touch you, cause I know that you feel me somehow.." She smiled and at that precise moment he went away, and though her heart downed with his departure, she felt like they shared a goodbye moment with those verses. So she went back to doing the only possible thing she could do, wait..

Jaana..

Dheere dheere aashna hone lage, tou yun lagta raha 
Chaar din hain mohobat ke, guzarte jaa rahe hain

Zara se jo maraasim barhe, hum ne jana 

Aap chaand, hum aapki chandni hote jaa rahe hain

Rafta rafta maraahil jo aatay gaye 

Dil ghabraane laga ke faasle hote jaa rahe hain

Shab-e-hijr jo yaadon main katt rahi hai 

Andhere ye aankhon main utarte jaa rahe hain

Wo aap ki hansi, wo lehje, wo kuch toote jumle 

Ab bhi mere kaanon main gounje jaa rahe hain

Yun mehsus hone laga hai, manzilon ko chor kar 

Hum raaston pe dar-ba-dar, bhatakte jaa rahe hain

Ab tou karam kijiye, ab tou zara pukaar lijiye 

Ye lamhon ke daaman warna, simat-te jaa rahe hain

Ab ke JAANA mere sabr ka aazmaa na kijiye 

Ke jate jate hum jaan se jaa rahe hain..

-Ms.Shehab

Faiz Ahmed Faiz

Guloon main Rang Bharay Baad-e-Nobahar Chalay

Chalay bhi aao Ke Gulshan ka Karobaar chalay

Qafas Udaas hai Yaaro!! Saba Se Kuch Tou Kaho

Kahin Tou Behr-e-Khuda Aaj Zikr-e-Yaar Chalay

Jo Hum Pe Guzri So Guzri Magar Shab-e-Hijraan 

Humare Ashk Teri Aaqbat sanwaar chalay

Muqaam Faiz koi Raah Main Jacha hee Nahin

Jo koy-e-Yaar Se Nikle Tou Soy-e-Daar Chalay...